Five Minute Friday ~ When You're Willing...

...but God says "No..."

???

If you'd ask me, I'd probably tell you that I mostly tend to be a willing person - mostly ready to help, most likely to say yes, first in line to give and sacrifice - at least a little, often looking for and working on those areas where I need to change...

My husband would probably agree with that statement. Actually, he'd probably say I'm too willing.It is often a cause of friction in our marriage: I want to... He wants to finish what we're already doing well before diving into more...

I'm willing, but he says "No," or at the very least, "At least not at this time..."

Then I'm unhappy.

Or mad, frustrated and giving him the silent treatment.

Or thinking he's selfish and not willing to let me serve and do because that means he'll have to serve and do more around the house.

Or assuming he's being a jerk.

Or...

But my numerous ors are almost always wrong. Sometimes I can see that once the anger and disappointment have passed. Occasionally I'll even admit that to be the case and ask forgiveness for my angry attitude and hasty words once my protestations of "But just think how great this would be for our family..." have been countered - that countering being either right or wrong.

That doesn't change the fact that it is hard when I've got a vision for something... when I feel convicted about something... when I'm sure I'm willing and I should be... and he says "No."

It's even harder when God says "No."

• No - I don't want you to serve there right now.
• No - Another child is not part of my plan for your family.
• No - That job was not for you.
• No - You think you need _____________________, but what you really need is _________________.
• Or just plain "No," and no explanations, no reasons or even good explanatory hypotheses, no thank-yous for your willingness, no understandings of why.

Sometimes there's just a "No," and arguing is futile. It doesn't usually stop me from from complaining, from pestering, from nagging, from trying to change God's mind, though... and in that trying, I show that I wasn't as willing as I thought I was. Or perhaps more willing to sacrifice than to simply obey, regardless of the cost ...or lack of cost.

Sometimes? 

When I'm willing and God says "No" I discover that really

• my will had not submitted to Almighty authority, 
• yes, I'm a willing person... willing to push my agenda, my decisions, my ideas, my will - regardless. Yeah...there's a dark side to being "willing."
• my motivations were inherently selfish and I didn't even know, 
• my willingness wasn't sincere because it was all about me and had very little to do with loving and serving God or with loving and serving others.

Am I willing to still smile and accept with gentle contentment when God says: 

"My child, you may be willing. But in this circumstance, this moment, I AM not?"

Do I accept that God, in His perfect and blessed unwillingness towards my thoughts and ideas might be working something I can't understand or see and might just be demonstrating His willingness towards another?

Jesus ran into that ~

...Father, if thou be willing, 

remove this cup from me: 

nevertheless not my will, 

but thine, 

be done.

(Luke 22.42, KJV)

(photos of the little girls with their cousins... 

one of those times when Mama was willing to let them play in the make-up.)

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Head on over to Lisa Jo's and join with us. 

We're writing on the topic of "willing" today.
And in the spirit of full disclosure - 6'30" for today's write.